Today I was rummaging through my closet at home and figured it was time to sort through all that childhood nostalgia. It has always been hard for me to judge what I will appreciate having kept and what I really just need to throw out. I was one of those kids that had an incredibly difficult time throwing away toys- they had feelings!
So, there I was knee deep in everything I had written since I was a tot, and I slowly felt myself reconnect with little Kas-a-fras. Apparently, she was not as far away as I thought. I found a lot of my “Daily House” newspapers circa the 1990s. The amateur journalist that I was proved that my world literally revolved within the safety of the daily on-goings of my childhood household. So, I was incredibly clever in naming it “Daily House”. It was filled with our pets revolting and my siblings refusing to do their chores. The ad sections heavy with requests from my parents– “Will feed you if lawn is mowed…etc etc.” Many a chuckle while reading through those, yet, my family treasures these little newspapers with great pride. Ahh to be so simple and innocent again!
I hesitantly threw away all the papers I wrote in high school, with the exception of a few newspaper articles I wrote for the high school paper. As an English major, it feels like an uncanny sense of doom when throwing out academic papers, like perhaps one day it will come back to haunt you. Alas, I figured I only needed to keep my college assignments and was able to unload a lot of drifting papers from my closet to the recycle, thank God I don’t have to ever go to high school again.
I kept the poems and fiction works from elementary school, mainly because it made me laugh. There were many treasures like a limerick about a Scottish cat that yodels and has a bad gland… priceless.
Reading all of my old writings from my elementary days up till the verge of my college career, I noticed that I couldn’t wipe a huge smile off my face. With each word it was like visiting an old friend, and I happily came to the conclusion that despite all the journeys life has taken me on, the core of me is still the same, and hopefully only growing wiser (not older). There were so many things that correlate perfectly to who I am today. My passions have not changed in the slightest. In 6th grade, I told my teacher that what she most needed to know about me was that I was really good at tennis (debatable today, yet still a lifelong love), I like to write- especially newspapers (my blog is very much like what that newspaper was), I like to write poetry (my perfection inhibits this A LOT now unfortunately), but that I like to “write out my feelings so I won’t feel so sad or bad or something” (Eloquent, I know). I go on to mention Nancy Drew and the Mandie stories, so obviously I liked reading too.
Who would have thought that little girl would have ended up being an English major. 😉
If there is one thing I know I can pat my back on is the fact that I have never given up on my passion, no matter how many times I really thought I could not keep going. And that made the little kid inside immensely proud of myself. If I could go back in time and talk to my 10-year-old self, I think she would tell me that she could not have dreamed for a happier future (and she was/is quite the daydreamer) and a more blessed life.
**And as a side note, I found proof that a teacher let me get away with writing “coon” when discussing Where the Red Fern Grows, I officially blame her for the embarrassing usage of that term later on in life. It’s a raccoon. Oh, and Nintendo is not pronounced intendo… and unfortunately I have no one to blame for that one… Now I need to go play Super Mario on the Nintendo 64….
Simply & Softly 