This blog post is a part of the Cherished Blogfest that I stumbled across in my roaming around the WordPress community. Their writing prompt is “What object do I cherish the most?” Feel free to join the conversation and create your own post about this topic and add it to the linked list of participants– or if you don’t have a blog, feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments! I thought their topic was appropriate and relevant to my life lately- happy writing and reading!
More than ever I’ve been contemplating the accumulation of “stuff” I’ve holed up like a pack rat over the years. I think living at home after college truly can revert you back to your childhood in a weird time-capsule sort of way.
Yet, like me, it’s changed over the past 18-odd years, though the bones have stayed the same. I’ve piled my typewriter, journals, England memorabilia (this includes hotel pens that I’m terrified will run out of ink… evidence showing my true hoarding capabilities), clothes, books, as well as so many other things that have meant something to me over the years. I’ve essentially collected objects that I’ve come to associate with who I am. Then I go in the Airstream and wonder how in the world I’m supposed to fit my entire life inside this aluminum-can-on-wheels. Do I think that if all these objects that have trailed me are gone, it will erase the history that I encapsulate inside them?
I think I have a gypsy heart some-days, itching to leave it all behind and be doing something else, restless for a change of scenery. Excited by the freedom of the future. Yet, here I am getting sentimental over a cheap plastic pen. I carry so much around with me. In essance, all these things that I collect around me have been given meaning beyond their physicality and even their usefulness.
One example is a gum tape dispenser (essentially a tape dispenser that holds wet tape) that belonged to my great-grandparent’s grocery store that I grew up in–napping in cardboard boxes, pricing canned goods, and playing “cashier” in the back stockroom/break room. I have absolutely no need for this heavy tape holder whatsoever. Yet, tears formed in my eyes when I was reunited with it. It’s as though just by looking at it, that special part of my childhood will continue to exist for me, even if other people can no longer experience it. I can still touch the store, a beautiful memory, and that means the world to me.
So as I start this journey of minimizing (because honestly, I think M will kick me out of the Airstream if I take that tape dispenser with me… unless I can find some useful purpose for it 😉), I’ve begun to wonder if it’s healthy to “cherish” things in this way. Perhaps all these things are just touchstones I’m clinging onto, afraid that I’ll lose a part of myself if I leave them behind.
I just need a little more square footage….😁
And so I’ll keep you posted on how I actively simplify through our renovating process, keeping these words from Eckhart Tollé in mind as I move forward:
“Most people’s lives are run by desire and fear.
Desire is the need to add something to yourself in order to be yourself more fully. All fear is the fear of losing something and thereby becoming diminished and being less.
These two movements obscure the fact that Being cannot be given or taken away. Being in its fullness is already within you, Now.”